I introduce myself as the new boss of your company. My step-father just retired and made me his successor. I am well aware of the comments you've made about me in the past, calling me being a "bratty bitch with a big ass." But all I have to say about this is: "You're right! I am a brat. And I have a big ass. And all of you will serve it!" Then I turn around, pull my pants down and I demand you pay attention.

I then go over a bunch of new office rules, including mandatory lunch time ass worship sessions for employees at random, smothering disciplinary sessions, and random ass worship sessions because sometimes my ass is just too big and pretty not to be worshipped. My ass is so greedy, I'm going to cut your pay and redirect it to my salary; and if you do a good job worshipping my ass consistently, then I *might* restore your pay to what it was. Don't even try to quit, because I'll make sure you can't get a job anywhere else in town. Should you make a mistake there will be consequences. I will discipline you by means of "public humiliation" where employees will have to worship my ass, in front of other employees, while saying sorry for whatever they did wrong. You're nothing but a gross, little dick loser, and I'm going to show you what it is like to work for "a big ass brat".

Finally I check my watch and say: "Well, it's getting late in the morning and my ass hasn't been licked." Looks like it's your turn. Lick it, bitch!

chefe briguento

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